In life, there is never a time when you say: I've arrived!
I’ve always thought that we were all part of a big game.
The first time I shared this thought to one of my classes, I had a complete silence and shocked eyes in front of me.
But think about it for a minute.
When we are born, we don’t know the rules, we learn them and as soon as we think we understand the game, BOOM a challenge comes in and destroys all our beliefs. We fall and we lose ‘a life’ (a part of us).
We get back up, play again, until we get a mini win which makes us play for longer. It’s a never-ending story.
There is no time in life when you say to yourself: That’s it! I’ve arrived.
The day you arrive is the day you die.
And still, I’m not sure that’s the real ending either. It might be a passage or a transition, who knows?
So what the hell is my point?
You have to play of the game. You can’t avoid it.
Are you a Player or aN NPC?
From there you have two solutions:
1/ You stop playing and you become an NPC (Non Player Character).
Meaning, you don’t risk anything, you avoid people, you don’t apply for the job you want, you don’t work, you rely on people or institutions…but unless you live on a desert island, society will ask you to do something about this. Even on a desert island, you’ll be asked to find your own food and water, which is not easy. So in any case, you may risk a form of rejection (from the game).
OR
2/ You play the game, aware that big monsters will be waiting for you around the corner. AAAArrrgh.
When we were kids, we were afraid of monsters. Now as adults, monsters have a name: Fear, Rejection, abandonment, loss, diseases…
Rejection is our most primal fear
Long time ago, when we were living in tribes, the only way to survive was to stay within our community. Alone, we would die. Alone, we had bigger chances to get killed by animals or other tribes and our chance of survival was pretty low.
Our brain is well aware of that, so it does everything to keep us safe.
BUT
What if fear is stopping us from doing what we want?
Let’s take an example, shall we?
Let’s say you have a job that doesn’t satisfy you. How long can you survive before it kills you (literally)?
So what would be the best course of action?
To find a better one.
So why haven’t you found a better one yet?
Because you tried once and you got rejected.
Have you applied for another job?
If the answer is no, then you’re not playing the game.
You’re stuck in level ONE.
To get to level TWO, you’ll have to fight the monster.
And that’s scary.
Why?
Because they might say ‘no’ again.
But what if you don’t take it personally and take it as a game?
Meaning, you apply to another job and another one and another one, until you get to level 2.
Would that not feel good to have a better job, a better salary? Can you see it?
Yes, I can see it for you. It would be nice.
When I’m in the right mood, I’ve applied to jobs or gigs that I wanted to do, without expecting an outcome but just to play the game. And sometimes I won. Many times I lost.
The idea is to keep aiming for what you want, knowing that a ‘no’ is just part of the game. As if you were in an escape room and you haven’t found the right clue yet, but it’s there…somewhere.
So my idea is completely different from Rejection Therapy, which is you look purposely for rejection. I’m not asking you to like rejection. It’s horrible.
Instead, I’m asking you to keep looking for the clues until a door opens.
And get to the next level.
I can’t deny that being in the game sucks at times. But being out of the game is even worse.
Love this analogy – I’ve never played video games (they hold zero interest for me) but watching the Ryan Reynolds movie FREE GUY about an NPC grabbing the reins and living life really inspired me. Your article nails this feeling!
Hey people!!!!!
Good mood and good luck to everyone!!!!!
Love this analogy – I’ve never played video games (they hold zero interest for me) but watching the Ryan Reynolds movie FREE GUY about an NPC grabbing the reins and living life really inspired me. Your article nails this feeling!
Thank you Lucy! I haven’t watch Free Guy yet, I must watch it!